Sunday, September 23, 2007

Divine Domestication II: Mending is not sewing; we’re talking Martha Stewart-worthy, Baby!


Cross my heart and hope to die...Stick a needle in your eye!


A stitch in one saves nine...


The Modern Woman is very busy; you can hardly find her in the kitchen unless it’s to make something in the microwave, let alone find her sitting home and knitting a nice scarf for herself or her loved one. The more likely outcome of a desire for a scarf is to go out and buy one. No time? There’s always e-Bay and paying someone else with more time (and patience) to do it for you. Of course, I do not deny that knitting was all the rage for awhile and even men were doing the “knit-one-purl-one”.

Yet, it definitely can be said that most of us won’t consider creating our own scarves ordinarily. The closest the majority of us would have gotten to indulging in such domestic delights is probably through Home Economics where sewing projects were a part of the course; I have yet to see anyone fail the subject as there is always Nanny, Granny, Mummy, “Maria/Yanti” (or in my case, Daddy) to help you with it, if you were just purely hopeless (or lazy).

My mother, obviously, lived in a different era, one where Stepford wives were lauded. She had a different idea of what a woman should accomplish and one of them was sewing. To be honest, I am more likely to throw something away then mend it since I have fashion ADD anyway (80% of my wardrobe is less than 3 months old). If I really had to get something fixed, I am more likely to cajole (browbeat) someone into doing it for me or bringing it to an alterations service or a dry-cleaners’ that offers such services. I do not think I am alone in this; many women would do the same thing! Learning to sew for me was the most grudging of experiences till much later, when I started to appreciate the advantages of such an uncommon skill in today’s generation.

I come from a financially-comfortable background, we’re not using fifty-dollar bills to light up fat cigars but we’ve certainly never worried about when our next meal is going to be. Many of my friends and peers are in similar positions; we are, indeed, a blessed lot that we have been indulged our whims and fancies. Material fulfillment is a delightful luxury but it is hell when it comes to birthdays and gift-buying. What do you give someone who has everything he/she wants? Or if there is something that person would want, it’s probably out of your budget. Finding a meaningful gift, thus, becomes a real drama.

Out of boredom, I picked up knitting from a friend’s mother. I did not think it would be particularly useful to me but she seemed so keen to teach me that I did not have the heart to refuse her offer of tutelage. Last year, I was searching frantically for a gift for a very dear male friend of mine. I have mentioned him before: he is the one man I literally cried myself sick over when he went back home for good. He had very exacting and particular taste and in my dire straits, I decided to knit him a scarf.

It was not a Martha Stewart-worthy creation but the simple (and slightly grubby by the end) result was enough to make him love it. I suppose money cannot buy you some things in life (as opposed to what MasterCard would lead us to believe): time, effort and the love put into a gift that is not “store-bought” will always mean so much more than an expensive gift from the best stores. A hand-crafted gift tells the recipient how much you mean to them; that they are worthy of that extra bit of “bother” and effort. (But please, the more cynical ones amongst us, do not confuse sincerity with tight arse-ness.)

Times have changed and many of us do not put much store into domestic accomplishments. In fact, many people scorn it, saying that being time-poor makes them unable to pursue such “hobbies”. Once an expectation of most womenfolk, it is now a rather rare talent that will make a person stand out in a crowd of increasingly domestically-challenged female population. Besides you never know when you’d need a needle to stick into a voodoo doll or stab someone in the eye with… Only joking but it

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